Friday, 19 February 2016

Using the Advantage of "The Outside"

This is not an original idea but it most certainly needs reinforcing; so, without further ado... Why is it nearly human nature to think one thing when we are looking upon someone else's situation, and yet give ourselves a much harder time when we are faced with a situation we would think different of if it was that "someone else"?

A friend will come to me with an issue maybe regarding university or work or a friend and I'll assure them of things that are totally right and totally things that will ease my friend's mind- because they should. I believe everything I'm saying and I'll be so glad to have helped. However this person may be giving themselves a hard time all the same. Because, like many I know, I do the same. I'll have my own issue and I'll put so much pressure on what's right and convince myself of some awful things. When, if I was my friend to myself, I'd understand the situation in a better and more honest light.

Although it's more of a drastic situation than I've been thinking of previously in this post, there was a situation in See Me by Nicholas Sparks where (SPOILERS. SPOILERS. BIG, BIG SPOILERS.), after someone (I won't name just in case you ignored SPOILERS SPOILERS PLEASE DON'T IGNORE THIS IF YOU HAVEN'T READ THE BOOK.) gets shot at Colin blames himself for various reasons. Everyone else knows it isn't his fault and they assure him of this, however he can't quite find it in him to believe it.

Now, we need to take our situations and put them to one side. We need to hear what other people say or what we know they would say and we need to apply all of this to when we are assessing a situation and ourselves. Of course I'm not saying that we need to be really nice to ourselves when we're in the wrong and that we don't need to act upon stuff, but we need to be so much kinder to ourselves. We need to save ourselves from the rain we can cause sometimes. We need the outside.

And, of course, there are terrible cases when someone or more than one people convince us of untrue and awful things. We would easily tell our friends or loved ones that they are totally in the wrong - or at least if they were right and putting it harshly, word it all much better - and so we need to be more caring with ourselves in these situations. If we look from the outside, we can see so much clearer!

Be a friend to yourself everyday!

Good Thoughts & Vibes,

The Girl in the Moonlight.

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